Fifty Year Old Won’t Be Detroit Tigers Fifth Starter (Video)
If you’re like me, healthy snacks tend to hang around longer than unhealthy ones. Consequently, I had an apple in my mini fridge at work a little past its prime. Rather than throw it out, I thought I’d offer it to the woodland critters living amongst the trees just beyond our parking lot. I was a Pony League All Star catcher in the 8th grade with a pretty good arm and thought it would be no problem to heave it 15-20 yards into the woods.
Out the door I went. I sized up the distance. I moved a little closer and sized it up some more. Took another step or two closer, then launched it toward the woods as though throwing out a runner at second base. As the apple took flight, bouncing just a little short of its destination, there was an audible snap in my shoulder followed by a fairly sharp pain. I was…uncomfortable for the rest of the day as the pain radiated outward from my shoulder, to my back and elbow. A little warm up may have been in order.
When I shared this story with my co-worker, Larry, he laughed and laughed. Commiserating, he shared with me how bad his knees are. But he explained that his arm was in great shape, and while he might not be able to run a hundred yard dash, he could certainly throw an apple into the woods. He looked out my office window toward yon forest, and confidently asserted, “Yeah, I could get it there, no problem.”
I assured him that he couldn’t. He took another look outside and confidently disagreed. It so happened that I had another apple so off we went to test his claim, each of us confident in our own way. The 24 second video below will not earn Larry the fifth spot in the Detroit Tiger’s rotation: