Emerald Catron has written for Asylum, Lemondrop, MyDaily and Daily Fill. She is one half of rap duo Dem Shortybooz and is a comedic performer around NYC. Follow her on Twitter @emeraldcatron
Emerald Catron
Man Arrested for Fighting Stop Sign
No matter how hard police tried, Raymond Garcia wouldn't *stop* fighting a stop sign. (See what we did there?) Officers in Roswell, New Mexico were responding to a report of a man fighting a stop sign, and that is exactly what they found. We aren't sure what the sign did, but it must've been pretty bad, because not even a taser could stop Garcia.
Michael Phelps Sinks Ridiculous Putt
You don't have to know much about golf to know that this is just ridiculous. Michael Phelps managed to sink a 153-foot putt at the Dunhill Links Championship. According to the announcer, Phelps is just learning to golf and is "26 handicapped," which we're pretty sure is Golf for "definitely shouldn't make this putt...
QVC Host Faints On-Air, Co-Host Keeps on Sellin’
As we've learned from Lady Gaga AND Justin Bieber, the show must go on. Fortunately (is it?) QVC guest host Cassie Slane didn't barf in front of her audience. She just fainted a little bit after a second of chest patting.
Marching Band Covers Classic Video Game Themes
Anybody who was in high school marching band can go ahead and hang their head in shame now. The Ohio State University marching band just made all those mornings you woke up early to practice 'Taking It to the Streets' totally obsolete.
Lady Gaga Hops on Bieber Train, Barfs Onstage
Did we miss something at Fashion Week? Is barf the hot thing this season, because we thought it was going to be brocade? Now Lady Gaga AND Justin Bieber have barfed onstage in the past week. We will give Gaga props for not letting it stop her...
Terrible Reporter Breaks Volunteers’ Hearts Live On Air
Well, here is a good example of a terrible person, if you were looking for one. Investigators in a case involving a missing four-year-old decided they were probably actually investigating a murder case. News reporter Kay Burley felt the strange compulsion to tell volunteers who were searching for the child that she was probably dead...
‘Clueless’ Cast (Mostly) Reunites 17 Years Later
First 'The Princess Bride,' and now the cast of 'Clueless' are getting back together. It's been a good week for reunions.
Adorable Kids Discuss Politics, Quickly Get Off Topic
Watching kids try to answer questions about politics is like watching a cat look at itself in the mirror -- it's funny because they don't know what we know. And also it's really cute. For example, our president is "Broccoli Llama," and when asked what party she belongs to, a little girls says "I can't do this question...
Amazing ‘Lockitron’ APP Will Unlock Your Door From Anywhere
Well, what could possibly go wrong? If you get the Lockitron, you'd only be making it possible to unlock your door with your cell phone from anywhere in the world. At the same time, if you forgot something at home, a friend wouldn't have to pick up your keys to get it...
Inconcievable! ‘Princess Bride’ Reunites for 25th Aniversary
It's hard to believe that 'The Princess Bride' was released 25 years ago, but here the cast is, 25 years older to prove it's really happened. They reunited for the New York Film Festival to celebrate the anniversary, and new Blu-Ray release. PLUS, in an interview with 'The Today Show,' Robin Wright admitted that she was totally in love with Cary Elwes, as any sane woman would have been.